Hammer gonna get you baby...

Last updated : 26 May 2010 By Les Roberts

He eats, sleeps, breathes Bizarre Inc does Avram!

You've probably read elsewhere, as it's all over the internet now, that Yakubu is to become Avram Grant's first post-World Cup signing for West Ham.

 In fact, so sure are these sites, that they all state that the Nigerian striker has 'agreed in principle' to join West Ham upon his return to South Africa.

Two problems with this story:

1) there are no quotes from anyone, not even 'sources close to the club/player' to say that any deal has been agreed 'in principle' or otherwise.

2) Avram Grant isn't actually West Ham's manager yet so it seems a bit previous to be announcing his first signing for the club, even if 'Upton Park sources' - ah! there they are! - say that they're "99 per cent" certain the Israeli is to join the Hammers from Portsmouth.

But, should the story prove to have any truth about it - it does seem plausible, especially if West Ham cash-in on Carlton Cole's over-valuation - then the Yak is said to on his way for £7 million.

Again, this seems feasible given that he's never really recovered the form that saw him net 23 goals in 2007/08 since rupturing his Achilles.

David Moyes wil be keen to replace the Nigerian, should we sell him, so it reassuring to hear one site exclaim that: "The Blues boss will also keep an eye on some targets at the World Cup where he has been enlisted by the BBC for radio commentaries."

Presumably he'd just be playing golf in Marbella for the whole of June had he not got a gig at the BBC then?!

And finally - it's the Two Ronnies part of Everton-mad - the mother of Lech Kaczynski, the Polish Prime Minister who was killed in a plane crash, has only just been told of her son's death!

It seems she's the last person in the world to find out about this as, according to the subtitles on BBC News 24,there were people crying on the streets of Walsall when they heard of the disaster...and that was  on April 10th, the day of the plane crash!